97 Bill Cosby Quotes from Iconic American Stand-up Comedian

Bill Cosby, a renowned American comedian, actor and producer, played a crucial role in promoting positive depictions of Blacks on television.

However, his legacy was tainted by multiple sexual assault allegations over several decades.

In 2018, he was convicted for drugging and sexually assaulting Andrea Constand but this conviction was overturned in 2021 due to a prior agreement with former district attorney Bruce L. Castor, Jr.


In 2022, Cosby faced a civil suit from Judy Huth for sexual assault in 1975 and was ordered to pay $500,000 in damages.

Cosby’s legacy is irreparably damaged by the numerous sexual assault allegations against him.

I have collected the quotes from Bill Cosby in this blog post.

Best Bill Cosby Quotes


The main goal of the future is to stop violence. The world is addicted to it. ~ Bill Cosby.


You can not make everybody happy… ~ Bill Cosby.


Family is conflict and it’s something that we all relate to. ~ Bill Cosby.


Don’t talk yourself into not being you. ~ Bill Cosby.

All Children Have Brain Damage! ~ Bill Cosby.

You also notice that the right side of your face feels like it’s sliding off of your skull. And your bottom lip is in your lap! ~ Bill Cosby.


How long can you tread water? ~ Bill Cosby.

The weatherman is always right. It’s just his timing that’s off. ~ Bill Cosby.

Your parents put a curse on you – Someday your kids are going to act just like you. ~ Bill Cosby.


It isn’t a matter of black is beautiful as much as it is white is not all that’s beautiful. ~ Bill Cosby.

When you graduate from college, they tell you to follow your dreams. Does anyone say you have to wake up first? ~ Bill Cosby.

Inspiring Bill Cosby Quotes

Every success story has a parent who says, ‘over my dead body.’ Every success story has an old person who walks up to you and says, when you’re acting the fool, ‘you know I worry about you sometimes.’ ~ Bill Cosby.

As a comedian, I can walk out in front of 5000 people and not worry about a thing. Not a thing, believe me. But to stand up a face a camera and crew of maybe 15 guys and get up tight about it – to me that’s weird. ~ Bill Cosby.

Betrayal, abandonment, deceit and manipulation. ~ Bill Cosby.

The summit, which is set up to educate people about managing their money and protecting their income, leads to empowerment of self, for which this summit needs to be applauded. ~ Bill Cosby.

You can’t be everything to everyone. ~ Bill Cosby.


Fatherhood is helping your children learn English as a foreign language. ~ Bill Cosby.

I once asked my father for a dollar for the school picnic. He told me how he once killed a grizzly bear with his loose-leaf notebook. ~ Bill Cosby.

A child who is disciplined will be more obedient and also more organized as a student. ~ Bill Cosby.


Those who criticize our generation forget who raised it. ~ Bill Cosby.

Inspirational Bill Cosby Quotes

I don’t have a clue about the way to achievement, however the way to disappointment is attempting to please everyone. ~ Bill Cosby.

All around the United States of America – in the cities and the counties – our public education is suffering and has been suffering. Cuts, cuts, cuts. ~ Bill Cosby.

I have to follow my thoughts and mine for the gold. I have to dig it out. ~ Bill Cosby.

I was a physical education major with a child psychology minor at Temple, which means if you ask me a question about a child’s behavior, I will advise you to tell the child to take a lap. ~ Bill Cosby.

Through humor, you can soften some of the worst blows that life delivers. And once you find laughter, no matter how painful your situation might be, you can survive it. ~ Bill Cosby.


Take your bottom lip and pull it over your head. ~ Bill Cosby.

If you took your child to the dentist and check for cavities, the child likely won’t get them. If you take them just for emergency, that’s all they’re gonna get. ~ Bill Cosby.

Kids need to remember that when you put something on Twitter, it’s not like whispering to your friend, you’ve put it on a billboard that the whole world, including your own kids someday, can see. ~ Bill Cosby.

Motivational Bill Cosby Quotes


In order to succeed, your desire for success should be greater than your fear of failure. ~ Bill Cosby.

In your 50s, time becomes precious and must not be wasted. Every minute is an excellent opportunity for a good nap. Happy 50th birthday! ~ Bill Cosby.

Raising children is an incredibly hard and risky business in which no cumulative wisdom is gained: each generation repeats the mistakes the previous one made. ~ Bill Cosby.

Why do I have to feed the kids? They just ate twelve hours ago! ~ Bill Cosby.

Give me 200 active 2-year-olds and I could conquer the world. ~ Bill Cosby.

Nothing I’ve ever done has given me more joys and rewards than being a father to my children. ~ Bill Cosby.


All parents experience the same problems. ~ Bill Cosby.

Anyone can dabble, but once you’ve made that commitment, your blood has that particular thing in it, and it’s very hard for people to stop you. ~ Bill Cosby.

Fatherhood is asking your son to make up a name rather than tell anybody who he is. ~ Bill Cosby.

Fatherhood is telling your daughter that Michael Jackson loves all his fans, but has special feelings for the ones who eat broccoli. ~ Bill Cosby.

Famous Bill Cosby Quotes

Gray hair is God’s graffiti. ~ Bill Cosby.


The past is a ghost, the future a dream and all we ever have is now. ~ Bill Cosby.

The first-born in every family is always dreaming for an imaginary older brother or sister who will look out for them. ~ Bill Cosby.

Let us now set forth one of the fundamental truths about marriage: the wife is in charge. ~ Bill Cosby.

Fatherhood is pretending the present you love most is soap-on-a-rope. ~ Bill Cosby.

Grandparents are God’s gifts to children. ~ Bill Cosby.

Sometimes you try to help people, and it backfires on you, and then they try to take advantage of you. ~ Bill Cosby.


Decide that you want it more than you are afraid of it. ~ Bill Cosby.

Every closed eye is not sleeping, and every open eye is not seeing. ~ Bill Cosby.

You people are not prepared. You are well educated and you look cute, but that’s not going to cut it. ~ Bill Cosby.

Top Bill Cosby Quotes

Men and women belong to different species and communications between them is still in its infancy. ~ Bill Cosby.

In my old neighborhood, a boy stopped playing when he began to lose his pulse. And then he became the referee. ~ Bill Cosby.


Zip zop wop boopity bop. ~ Bill Cosby.

If the new American father feels bewildered and even defeated, let him take comfort from the fact that whatever he does in any fathering situation has a fifty percent chance of being right. ~ Bill Cosby.

I don’t think you can bring the races together by joking about the differences between them. I’d rather talk about the similarities, about what’s universal in their experiences. ~ Bill Cosby.

It is a warning, Godspeed. It means you are no longer welcome here at these prices. ~ Bill Cosby.

Brown versus the Board of Education is no longer the white person’s problem. ~ Bill Cosby.


The essence of childhood, of course, is play, which my friends and I did endlessly on streets that we reluctantly shared with traffic. ~ Bill Cosby.

You can turn painful situations around through laughter. If you can find humor in anything, even poverty, you can survive it. ~ Bill Cosby.

Popular Bill Cosby Quotes

There is no labor a person does that is undignified; if they do it right. ~ Bill Cosby.

People can be more forgiving than you can imagine. But you have to forgive yourself. Let go of what’s bitter and move on. ~ Bill Cosby.

Is the glass half full, or half empty? It depends on whether you’re pouring, or drinking. ~ Bill Cosby.

Always end the name of your child with a vowel, so that when you yell the name will carry. ~ Bill Cosby.

Women don’t want to hear what you think. Women want to hear what they think – in a deeper voice. ~ Bill Cosby.

After creating the heaven, the earth, the ocean, and the entire animal kingdom, God created Adam and Eve. And the first thing He said to them was Don’t. ~ Bill Cosby.

If you can find humour in anything, you can survive it. ~ Bill Cosby.


A word to the wise ain’t necessary, it’s the stupid ones who need advice. ~ Bill Cosby.

Human beings are the only creatures that allow their children to come back home. ~ Bill Cosby.

Don’t let your victories go to your head, or your failures go to your heart. ~ Bill Cosby.

Great Bill Cosby Quotes

The very first law in advertising is to avoid the concrete promise and cultivate the delightfully vague. ~ Bill Cosby.

Old is always fifteen years from now. ~ Bill Cosby.

Calculus is one course you can come with to your parents and say, I am dropping it. And they’ll understand. ~ Bill Cosby.

A sailboat that sails backwards can never see the sun rise. ~ Bill Cosby.

The heart of marriage is memories; and if the two of you happen to have the same ones and can savor your reruns, then your marriage is a gift from the gods. ~ Bill Cosby.

A grandchild is God’s reward for raising a child. ~ Bill Cosby.

Did you ever see the customers in health – food stores? They are pale, skinny people who look half – dead. In a steak house, you see robust, ruddy people. They’re dying, of course, but they look terrific. ~ Bill Cosby.

Funny Bill Cosby Quotes

A pelican that is wet walks with a gated limp, but a dry fish swims alone. ~ Bill Cosby.

Civilization had too many rules for me, so I did my best to rewrite them. ~ Bill Cosby.

My eleven year old daughter mopes around the house all day waiting for her breasts to grow. ~ Bill Cosby.

You know the only people who are always sure about the proper way to raise children? Those who’ve never had any. ~ Bill Cosby.

Parents are not interested in justice, they’re interested in peace and quiet. ~ Bill Cosby.

If you know what you want, you will recognize it when you see it. ~ Bill Cosby.

No matter how calmly you try to referee, parenting will eventually produce bizarre behavior, and I’m not talking about the kids. Their behavior is always normal. ~ Bill Cosby.

I often try to tell kids to think about all the people who love you, don’t cry over the one person who doesn’t. ~ Bill Cosby.

The serve was invented so that the net could play. ~ Bill Cosby.

I’m not sure if my parents had me because they loved me, or because they wanted someone to watch their other children. ~ Bill Cosby.

A word to the wise ain’t necessary – it’s the stupid ones that need the advice. ~ Bill Cosby.

Immortality is a long shot, I admit. But somebody has to be first. ~ Bill Cosby.


The secret of success is to be like a duck, Smooth and unruffled on top, But paddling furiously underneath. ~ Bill Cosby.

Mediocre people are the most dangerous people in the world. ~ Bill Cosby.

When you become senile, you won’t know it. ~ Bill Cosby.

Why do kids always say peace out, I thought peace was in. ~ Bill Cosby.

If you have no faith, you’ve lost your battle. ~ Bill Cosby.

If you want to be seen, stand up. If you want to be heard, speak up. If you want to be appreciated, shut up. ~ Bill Cosby.

My father walked to school 4 o’clock every morning with no shoes on, uphill, both ways, in 5 feet of snow and he was thankful. ~ Bill Cosby.

So these were the 97 top Bill Cosby quotes and sayings.

If you like these quotes and sayings, then you can also read my other posts on Bear Bryant quotes and Beth Moore quotes.

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Chandan Negi
Chandan Negi

I’m the Founder of Internet Pillar - I love sharing quotes and motivational content to inspire and motivate people - #quotes #motivation #internetpillar