Dorothy Parker was a New York-based American poet, writer, critic, and satire.

Her humour, wisecracks, and eye for 20th-century urban foibles made her famous.

Parker gained to fame as a founding member of the Algonquin Round Table and for her literary works published in journals such as The New Yorker, despite a tumultuous and traumatic background.

We have compiled a list of the best quotes from Dorothy Parker for you.

Best Dorothy Parker Quotes

1. “The cure for boredom is curiosity. There is no cure for curiosity.” ~ (Dorothy Parker).

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2. “Creativity is a wild mind and a disciplined eye.” ~ (Dorothy Parker).

3. “What fresh hell is this?” ~ (Dorothy Parker).

4. “Of course I talk to myself. I like a good speaker, and I appreciate an intelligent audience.” ~ (Dorothy Parker).

5. “Never throw mud: you can miss the target, but your hands will remain dirty.” ~ (Dorothy Parker).

6. “Writing well is the best revenge.” ~ (Dorothy Parker).

7. “If you don’t have anything nice to say, come sit by me.” ~ (Dorothy Parker).

8. “I hate writing, I love having written.” ~ (Dorothy Parker).

9. “Art is a form of catharsis emotional release, purging, cleansing, purifying.” ~ (Dorothy Parker).

10. “I give her sadness and the gift of pain, a new moon madness and a love of rain.” ~ (Dorothy Parker).

Popular Dorothy Parker Quotes

11. “They sicken of the calm who know the storm.” ~ (Dorothy Parker).

12. “Never complain, never explain.” ~ (Dorothy Parker).


13. “Don’t look at me in that tone of voice.” ~ (Dorothy Parker).

14. “The first thing I do in the morning is brush my teeth and sharpen my tongue.” ~ (Dorothy Parker).

15. “Women and elephants never forget.” ~ (Dorothy Parker).

16. “The best way to avoid a hangover is to stay drunk.” ~ (Dorothy Parker).

17. “You can lead a horticulture, but you can’t make her think.” ~ (Dorothy Parker).

18. “Time may be a great healer, but it’s a lousy beautician.” ~ (Dorothy Parker).

19. “My first love was Cinderella, but she ran off with another man.” ~ (Dorothy Parker).

20. “Heterosexuality is not normal, it’s just common.” ~ (Dorothy Parker).

Top Dorothy Parker Quotes

21. “Don’t feel bad when I die; I’ve been dead for a long time.” ~ (Dorothy Parker).

22. “Honesty means nothing until you are tested under circumstances where you are sure you could get away with dishonesty.” ~ (Dorothy Parker).

23. “The sweeter the apple, the blacker the core. Scratch a lover and find a foe!” ~ (Dorothy Parker).

24. “Genius can write on the back of old envelopes but mere talent requires the finest stationery available.” ~ (Dorothy Parker).

25. “I’m not a writer with a drinking problem, I’m a drinker with a writing problem.” ~ (Dorothy Parker).

26. “Every year, back comes Spring, with nasty little birds yapping their fool heads off and the ground all mucked up with plants.” ~ (Dorothy Parker).


27. “I don’t know much about being a millionaire, but I’ll bet I’d be darling at it.” ~ (Dorothy Parker).

28. “I require only three things of a man. He must be handsome, ruthless and stupid.” ~ (Dorothy Parker).

29. “Travel, trouble, music, art, a kiss, a frock, a rhyme – I never said they feed my heart, but still they pass my time.” ~ (Dorothy Parker).

30. “If you want to know what God thinks about money, just look at the people He gives it to.” ~ (Dorothy Parker).

31. “Writing is the art of applying the ass to the seat.” ~ (Dorothy Parker).

Famous Dorothy Parker Quotes

32. “A hangover is the wrath of grapes.” ~ (Dorothy Parker).

33. “This living, this living, this living Was never a project of mine.” ~ (Dorothy Parker).

34. “Years are only garments, and you either wear them with style all your life, or else you go dowdy to the grave.” ~ (Dorothy Parker).

35. “By the time you swear you’re his, Shivering and sighing. And he vows his passion is, Infinite, undying. Lady make note of this – One of you is lying.” ~ (Dorothy Parker).

36. “If love is blind, why is lingerie so popular?” ~ (Dorothy Parker).

37. “The sun’s gone dim, and the moon’s gone black. For I loved him, and he didn’t love back.” ~ (Dorothy Parker).


38. “It serves me right for putting all my eggs in one bastard.” ~ (Dorothy Parker).

39. “The best way to keep children at home is to make the home atmosphere pleasant, and let the air out of the tires.” ~ (Dorothy Parker).

40. “Quick!! Act as if nothing has happened!” ~ (Dorothy Parker).

41. “Be you wise and never sad, You will get your lovely lad. Never serious be, nor true, And your wish will come to you – And if that makes you happy, kid, You’ll be the first it ever did.” ~ (Dorothy Parker).

42. “Newton’s Fourth Law: Every action has an equal and opposite satisfaction.” ~ (Dorothy Parker).

43. “That would be a good thing for them to cut on my tombstone: Wherever she went, including here, it was against her better judgment.” ~ (Dorothy Parker).

Short Dorothy Parker Quotes

44. “The definition of eternity is two people and a ham.” ~ (Dorothy Parker).

45. “That woman speaks eighteen languages, and can’t say ‘No’ in any of them.” ~ (Dorothy Parker).

46. “Three be the things I shall never attain: Envy, content, and sufficient champagne.” ~ (Dorothy Parker).

47. “Oh, life is a glorious cycle of song, a medley of extemporanea, And love is a thing that can never go wrong, and I am Marie of Romania.” ~ (Dorothy Parker).

48. “But I don’t give up; I forget why not.” ~ (Dorothy Parker).

49. “Trapped like a trap in a trap.” ~ (Dorothy Parker).

50. “You think You’re frightening me with Your hell, don’t You? You think Your hell is worse than mine.” ~ (Dorothy Parker).

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