William Melvin Hicks was a stand-up comedian, social critic, satirist, and musician from the United States.
Best Bill Hicks Quotes
The eyes of love see all of us as one. ~ Bill Hicks.
Just one thing I know for sure, chicks dig jerks. ~ Bill Hicks.
Isn’t that weird, we’ve made nature against the law. That’s how unnatural we’ve become. ~ Bill Hicks.
Watching television is like taking black spray paint to your third eye. ~ Bill Hicks.
Well we looked at all the people in the Bible and we added ’em up all the way back to Adam and Eve, their ages: 12,000 years. ~ Bill Hicks.
I’m a heavy smoker. I go through two lighters a day. ~ Bill Hicks.
We are the facilitators of our own creative evolution. ~ Bill Hicks.
I need my sleep. I need about eight hours a day, and about ten at night. ~ Bill Hicks.
Childbirth is no more a miracle then eating food and a turd coming out of your ass. ~ Bill Hicks.
All your beliefs, they’re just that. They’re nothing. They’re how you were taught and raised. That doesn’t make ’em real. ~ Bill Hicks.
I don’t do drugs anymore… than, say, the average touring funk band. ~ Bill Hicks.
Would you let the aliens land, please? They might be here to pick me up. ~ Bill Hicks.
Funny Bill Hicks Quotes
Women priests. Great, great. Now there’s priests of both sexes I don’t listen to. ~ Bill Hicks.
Writing, acting, music, comedy. A deep love of literature and books. Thank God for all the artists who’ve helped me. ~ Bill Hicks.
When two or more people agree on an issue, I form on the other side. ~ Bill Hicks.
Children are smarter than any of us. Know how I know that? I don’t know one child with a full time job and children. ~ Bill Hicks.
The definition of black irony is Pro-lifers killing Doctors who do abortions. ~ Bill Hicks.
Jesus-murdered. Martin Luther King-murdered. Gandhi-murdered. Malcolm X-murdered. Reagan-wounded. ~ Bill Hicks.
We all pay for life with death, so everything in between should be free. ~ Bill Hicks.
Oh my God. Lift me up out of this illusion, Lord. Heal my perception that I might know only reality and only you. ~ Bill Hicks.
No one can give you any answers. There aren’t any. You have to discover for yourself-you must learn to navigate the mystery. ~ Bill Hicks.
I’m tired of this back-slappin’ “isn’t humanity neat” bullshit. We’re a virus with shoes. ~ Bill Hicks.
Hilarious Bill Hicks Quotes
Don’t worry, don’t be afraid, ever, because this is just a ride. ~ Bill Hicks.
There’s no such thing as death, life is only a dream, and we’re the imagination of ourselves. Here’s Tom with the weather. ~ Bill Hicks.
I believe that God left certain drugs growing naturally upon our planet to help speed up and facilitate our evolution. ~ Bill Hicks.
Music is a great energizer. It’s a language everybody knows. ~ Bill Hicks.
I can’t watch TV longer than five minutes without praying for nuclear holocaust. ~ Bill Hicks.
I’m an American who loves an America which doesn’t exist, which is a land of freedom and free ideas. ~ Bill Hicks.
We’re supposed to keep evolving. Evolution did not end with us growing opposable thumbs. You do know that, right? ~ Bill Hicks.
Your denial is beneath you, and thanks to the use of hallucinogenic drugs, I see through you. ~ Bill Hicks.
Today a young man on acid realized that all matter is merely energy condensed to a slow vibration, that we are all one consciousness experiencing itself subjectively, there is no such thing as death, life is only a dream, and we are the imagination of ourselves. Heres Tom with the Weather. ~ Bill Hicks.
It’s not a war on drugs, it’s a war on personal freedom. ~ Bill Hicks.
Ever noticed that people who believe in Creationism look really unevolved? ~ Bill Hicks.
I left in love, in laughter, and in truth, and wherever truth, love and laughter abide, I am there in spirit. ~ Bill Hicks.
I do not believe making money in order to consume goods is mankind’s sole purpose on this planet. ~ Bill Hicks.
If I thought the Jews killed God, I’d worship the Jews. ~ Bill Hicks.
Popular Bill Hicks Quotes
If you are living for tomorrow, you will always be one day behind. ~ Bill Hicks.
It has become more and more obvious that there is one political party in America, and that is The Business Party. ~ Bill Hicks.
I believe the cost of life is Death and we will all pay that in full. Everything else should be a gift. ~ Bill Hicks.
BTW A 24 week old embryo is not a human being. You’re not a human being until you’re in my phone book. ~ Bill Hicks.
Man, the Beatles were so high, they let Ringo sing a coupla tunes. Tell me they weren’t partyin’. ~ Bill Hicks.
I smoke to fill the potholes in my soul. ~ Bill Hicks.
Nonsmokers – this is for you and you only. Ready? Nonsmokers die every day. Sleep tight. ~ Bill Hicks.
Dinosaur fossils were placed in rocks by prankster God just to make human beings think the world is older than it is. ~ Bill Hicks.
Oh sorry, I was taking life seriously. ~ Bill Hicks.
Mushrooms grow on cow turds. I love that. I think that’s why you giggle the first hour. ~ Bill Hicks.
You are the imagination of yourself. ~ Bill Hicks.
I don’t mean to sound bitter, cold, or cruel, but I am, so that’s how it comes out. ~ Bill Hicks.
Top Bill Hicks Quotes
I don’t care if you’re obscene, filthy, horrendous – as long as you’re honest. ~ Bill Hicks.
Keith Richards outlived Jim Fixx, the runner and health nut. The plot thickens. ~ Bill Hicks.
I’m sorry if any of you are Catholic. I’m not sorry if you’re offended, I’m actually just sorry by the fact that you’re Catholic. ~ Bill Hicks.
They Want You To Be A Docile Apathetic Consumer. ~ Bill Hicks.
I’m totally confused about what I’m going to do with my life. ~ Bill Hicks.
It’s all about money, not freedom. If you think you’re free, try going somewhere without money, okay? ~ Bill Hicks.
If you’re so pro-life, do me a favour: don’t lock arms and block medical clinics. If you’re so pro-life, lock arms and block cemeteries. ~ Bill Hicks.
What does an atheist scream when they come? ~ Bill Hicks.
My voice was not heard, the questions were not asked that I wanted to see asked. ~ Bill Hicks.
Be yourself on stage. Nobody else can be you and you have the law of supply and demand covered. ~ Bill Hicks.
Good comedy helps people know they’re not alone. Great comedy provides an answer. ~ Bill Hicks.
What are you reading for? ~ Bill Hicks.
All governments are lying cocksuckers. ~ Bill Hicks.
You all saw him – he had a gun. ~ Bill Hicks.
Right foot, left foot, hemorrhage. ~ Bill Hicks.
Listen, the next revolution is gonna be a revolution of ideas. ~ Bill Hicks.
Humanity is just a virus with shoes. ~ Bill Hicks.
Famous Bill Hicks Quotes
I believe that there is an equality to all humanity. We all suck. ~ Bill Hicks.
Shut up! Go back to bed, America. Your government is in control. Here’s Love Connection. Watch this and get fat and stupid. ~ Bill Hicks.
I’m just skin covering coffee and some real nervous teeth. ~ Bill Hicks.
They proved that if you quit smoking, it will prolong your life. What they haven’t proved is that a prolonged life is a good thing. I haven’t seen the stats on that yet. ~ Bill Hicks.
What kind of people are these with such low self-esteem that they need a war to feel better about themselves? ~ Bill Hicks.
Any organization created out of fear must create fear to survive. ~ Bill Hicks.
The American dream is a crock. Stop wanting everything. Everyone should wear jeans and have three T-shirts, eat rice and beans. ~ Bill Hicks.
It’s just a ride. ~ Bill Hicks.
If you don’t think drugs have done good things for us, then take all of your records, tapes and CD’s and burn them. ~ Bill Hicks.
I’m just trying to rid the world of all these fevered egos that are tainting our collective unconscious… ~ Bill Hicks.
It’s always funny until someone gets hurt. Then it’s just hilarious. ~ Bill Hicks.
Ultimate Bill Hicks Quotes
You think when Jesus comes back, he really wants to see a cross? That’s like going up to Jackie Onassis with a rifle pendant on. ~ Bill Hicks.
It’s an insane world, and I’m proud to be a part of it. ~ Bill Hicks.
The role of the comedian is to say ‘Wait a minute’ when a consensus starts to form. ~ Bill Hicks.
It’s my object to be stared at like a dog that’s just been shown a card trick. ~ Bill Hicks.
I wouldn’t give Satan a snowball’s chance in Hell against a woman’s ego… ~ Bill Hicks.
I get a kick out of being an outsider constantly. It allows me to be creative. ~ Bill Hicks.
I believe it is our own misperceptions of who we really are that leads to every self-created hell you’ll find in this world. ~ Bill Hicks.
So these were the 83 top Bill Hicks quotes on life, politics and religion.