101 Steven Moffat Quotes from Scottish Television Writer

Steven Moffat is a Scottish television writer, television producer and screenwriter.

Best Steven Moffat Quotes and Sayings

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1. “I always rip out the last page of a book, then it doesn’t have to end. I hate endings.” ~ (Steven Moffat).

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2. “Brainy’s the new sexy.” ~ (Steven Moffat).

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3. “You don’t just give up. You don’t just let things happen. You make a stand! You say no! You have the guts to do what’s right, even when everyone else just runs away.” ~ (Steven Moffat).


4. “All lives end. All hearts are broken. Caring is not an advantage.” ~ (Steven Moffat).

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5. “Demons run when a good man goes to war.” ~ (Steven Moffat).

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6. “As we all know, it is the proper duty of every British subject to come to the aid of the TARDIS.” ~ (Steven Moffat).

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7. “You want weapons? We’re in a library! Books! The best weapons in the world!” ~ (Steven Moffat).

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8. “Never knowingly be serious. Rule 27.” ~ (Steven Moffat).


9. “There’s something that doesn’t make sense. Let’s go and poke it with a stick.” ~ (Steven Moffat).

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10. “Like most writers, I write about what has happened to me as that involves the minimum amount of research.” ~ (Steven Moffat).

11. “The universe is big, its vast and complicated, and ridiculous. And sometimes, very rarely, impossible things just happen and we call them miracles. And that’s the theory. Nine hundred years, never seen one yet, but this would do me.” ~ (Steven Moffat).

12. “You should always waste time when you don’t have any. Time is not the boss of you. Rule 408.” ~ (Steven Moffat).

13. “An awful lot of storytelling isn’t really about making people understand – it’s about making people care.” ~ (Steven Moffat).

14. “The Doctor: Don’t blink. Don’t even blink. Blink and you’re dead. Don’t turn your back. Don’t look away. And don’t blink.” ~ (Steven Moffat).

15. “Madness is just what a genius looks like to a tiny mind.” ~ (Steven Moffat).

16. “Demons run when a good man goes to war Night will fall and drown the sun When a good man goes to war Friendship dies and true love lies Night will fall and the dark will rise When a good man goes to war Demons run, but count the cost The battle’s won, but the child is lost.” ~ (Steven Moffat).

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17. “Never ignore a coincidence. Unless you’re busy, in which case, always ignore a coincidence.” ~ (Steven Moffat).

18. “Reinette: One may tolerate a world of demons for the sake of an angel.” ~ (Steven Moffat).

19. “Never run when you’re scared. Rule 7.” ~ (Steven Moffat).

20. “Everybody knows that everybody dies. But not every day. Not today. Some days are special. Some days are so, so blessed. Some days, nobody dies at all. Now and then, every once in a very long while, every day in a million days, when the wind stands fair and the Doctor comes to call, everybody lives.” ~ (Steven Moffat).

21. “Time travel is always more magical somehow when you go into the past. Traveling into the future is something you do, every day. You’re just not going to get very far. So, I rather like the past travel.” ~ (Steven Moffat).

22. “The Doctor: Doctor Song, you’ve got that face on again. River: What face? The Doctor: The “He’s hot when he’s clever” face. River: This is my normal face. The Doctor: Yes it is. River: Oh, shut up. The Doctor: Not a chance.” ~ (Steven Moffat).


23. “It’s a TV show. Only the emotional damage is real.” ~ (Steven Moffat).

24. “Don’t play games with me! You just killed someone I like, that is not a safe place to stand! I’m the Doctor, and you’re in the biggest library in the Universe. Look me up.” ~ (Steven Moffat).

25. “There’s something really cool about scaring children. Traumatize a generation, that’s what it’s all about.” ~ (Steven Moffat).

26. “Rule 1: The Doctor lies.” ~ (Steven Moffat).

Top Steven Moffat Quotes

27. “The Doctor: Just had a fall. All the way down there, right to the library. Heck of a climb back up. Amelia: You’re soaking wet. The Doctor: I was in the swimming pool. Amelia: You said you were in the library. The Doctor: So was the swimming pool.” ~ (Steven Moffat).

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28. “Kathy Nightingale: What’s good about sad? Sally Sparrow: It’s happy for deep people.” ~ (Steven Moffat).

29. “Fascinatingly confident, rude people are great.” ~ (Steven Moffat).

30. “Young Reinette: Monsieur, be careful! The Doctor: It’s just a nightmare, Reinette, don’t worry, everyone has nightmares. Even monsters under the bed have nightmares! Young Reinette: What do monsters have nightmares about? The Doctor: Me!” ~ (Steven Moffat).

31. “Witty and mean is easy – but fond and funny is hard.” ~ (Steven Moffat).

32. “What’s the point of being a grown-up if you don’t get to be immature?” ~ (Steven Moffat).

33. “I don’t think, generally speaking, people become writers because they were the really good, really cool, attractive kid in class. I’ll be honest. This is our revenge for people who were much better looking and more popular than us. I was a bit like that, I suppose.” ~ (Steven Moffat).

34. “If it’s time to go, remember what you’re leaving. Remember the best.” ~ (Steven Moffat).

35. “Madame Kovarian: The anger of a good man is not a problem. Good men have too many rules. The Doctor: Good men don’t need rules. Today is not the day to find out why I have so many.” ~ (Steven Moffat).

36. “River Song: Right then. I have questions, but number one is this – what in the name of sanity have you got on your head? The Doctor: It’s a fez. I wear a fez now. Fezzes are cool.” ~ (Steven Moffat).


37. “Always take a banana to a party.” ~ (Steven Moffat).

38. “Bow ties are cool.” ~ (Steven Moffat).

39. “Well we’ve moved through the funfair a bit – we’ve done the rollercoaster, now we’re on the ghost train.” ~ (Steven Moffat).

40. “Between the marriages, I shagged my way round television studios like a mechanical digger.” ~ (Steven Moffat).

41. “It’s a fez. I wear a fez now. Fezes are cool.” ~ (Steven Moffat).

42. “You have to take your own bold approach, and if you do you will be rewarded with success. Or calamitous failure. That can happen too.” ~ (Steven Moffat).

43. “Though the man above might say hello, expect no love from the beast below.” ~ (Steven Moffat).

44. “See the bowtie? I wear it and I don’t care. That’s why it’s cool.” ~ (Steven Moffat).


45. “I’d forgotten not all victories are about saving the universe.” ~ (Steven Moffat).

46. “I like that Helen Mirren has been saying the next doctor should be a woman. I would like to go on record and say that the queen should be played by a man.” ~ (Steven Moffat).

47. “To me, a ‘brand’ sounds evil.” ~ (Steven Moffat).

48. “I don’t want to think that the stories are finite; I want to feel that they can go on forever.” ~ (Steven Moffat).

49. “I always tend to favor the newer idea.” ~ (Steven Moffat).

50. “So is this how it works Doctor? You never interfere with the affairs of other peoples or planets, unless there are children crying?” ~ (Steven Moffat).

Famous Steven Moffat Quotes

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51. “You don’t want to take over the universe. You wouldn’t know what to do with it beyond shout at it.” ~ (Steven Moffat).

52. “River Song? Amy Pond? Hardly weak women. It’s the exact opposite. You could accuse me of having a fetish for powerful, sexy women who like cheating people. That would be fair.” ~ (Steven Moffat).

53. “It’s been a long time since Sherlock Holmes jumped off that roof – it’s time to reveal the truth about what happened between him and the pavement.” ~ (Steven Moffat).

54. “The Doctor: I’ve seen bigger. Clara: Really? The Doctor: Are you joking? It’s massive!” ~ (Steven Moffat).

55. “Keep this straight in your head: we are not fighting an alien invasion we’re leading a revolution. And today the battle begins.” ~ (Steven Moffat).

56. “Do you know how you make someone into a Dalek? Subtract Love, add Anger.” ~ (Steven Moffat).


57. “I don’t know. I can’t tell the future I just work there.” ~ (Steven Moffat).

58. “I find it’s bizarre that science fiction is the one branch of television to push the idea of strong female characters. And I only call it bizarre because strong women aren’t fiction.” ~ (Steven Moffat).

59. “You can be as beautiful and charming as you’d like, but if you’re not terrific at acting, it will mean nothing on the screen.” ~ (Steven Moffat).

60. “The day you lose someone isn’t the worst -at least you’ve got something to do- it’s all the days they stay dead.” ~ (Steven Moffat).

61. “I was called a misogynist because I was reducing women to mothers. ‘Reducing women to mothers’ – now there is possibly the most anti-women statement I’ve heard.” ~ (Steven Moffat).

62. “Everything ends and it’s always sad, but everything begins again, too. And that’s always happy. Be happy. – Return of Doctor Mysterio.” ~ (Steven Moffat).

Inspiring Steven Moffat Quotes

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63. “I can’t see what’s wrong about assuming intelligence in your audience and what’s bad news about being rewarded for assuming that.” ~ (Steven Moffat).

64. “I never go online. The Internet stuff is bonkers. You must not look at it.” ~ (Steven Moffat).

65. “Because every time you see them happy you remember how sad they’re going to be. And it breaks your heart. Because what’s the point in them being happy now if they’re going to be sad later. The answer is, of course, because they are going to be sad later.” ~ (Steven Moffat).

66. “When writing comedy, you have to have the confidence to believe that there is only one type of relationship in the world, and we are all having it, that all men behave in the same way and so do all women.” ~ (Steven Moffat).

67. “You’ll go out of business if you think people are stupid.” ~ (Steven Moffat).

68. “I absolutely love television, and I don’t mean to be vulgar, but as I keep having to explain to people from the movie industry, I get more power and more money doing television, so why on earth would I do a film?” ~ (Steven Moffat).

69. “The trouble with a series as it gets older is it can feel like a tradition, and tradition is the enemy of suspense, and it’s the enemy of comedy. It’s the enemy of everything, really. So you have to shake it up.” ~ (Steven Moffat).

70. “When you’re surrounded by friends and exes, there’s a whole lot of stuff that starts crawling out. But however serious and traumatic those experiences may be to the participant, to the onlooker they’re hilarious.” ~ (Steven Moffat).

71. “If you don’t expect to like someone and then you do, that’s an incredibly exciting moment.” ~ (Steven Moffat).

72. “If you take most men aside when their wives are pregnant, most men are pretty frightened and worried and faintly disgusted by the whole experience.” ~ (Steven Moffat).

73. “Is there a word for ‘total screaming genius’ that sounds modest and a tiny bit sexy?” ~ (Steven Moffat).

74. “Writing for adults often means just increasing the swearing – but find an alternative to swearing and you’ve probably got a better line.” ~ (Steven Moffat).

75. “I can say with pride verging on smugness that I’ve got two very successful shows that assume their audience is very smart.” ~ (Steven Moffat).

Short Steven Moffat Quotes

76. “I’ve finally run out of corridor. There’s a life summed up.” ~ (Steven Moffat).

77. “Never trust a hug. It’s just a way to hide your face.” ~ (Steven Moffat).

79. “Maybe I’m in Hell. That’s okay, I’m not scared of Hell – it’s just Heaven for bad people.” ~ (Steven Moffat).

80. “Good is good in the final hour, in the deepest pit – without hope, without witness, without reward. Virtue is only virtue in extremis.” ~ (Steven Moffat).

81. “My priorities are where they should be, which is making really great, really exciting television.” ~ (Steven Moffat).

82. “I think training in comedy, as it were, a history writing comedy, is a powerful tool for anyone.” ~ (Steven Moffat).

83. “We all change, when you think about it. We’re all different people all through our lives. And that’s OK, that’s good, you gotta keep moving, so long as you remember all the people that you used to be.” ~ (Steven Moffat).

84. “My problem is that the audience is more fiction-literate than ever. In Shakespeare’s day, you probably expected to see a play once or twice in your life; today you experience four or five different kinds of fiction every day. So staying ahead of the audience is impossible.” ~ (Steven Moffat).

85. “I think of myself as a writer with a sense of humor rather than a comedy writer. Happy to tell a story with lots of jokes in it – I wouldn’t know how to do jokes without the story.” ~ (Steven Moffat).

86. “We all change, when you think about it, we’re all different people; all through our lives, and that’s okay, that’s good, you’ve gotta keep moving, so long as you remember all the people that you used to be. I will not forget one line of this, not one day, I swear. I will always remember when the Doctor was me.” ~ (Steven Moffat).

87. “The way you get your script to the right people is that you put it in an envelope. It’s easy. The difficult bit is writing something that is so good people will take a punt on a brand new writer.” ~ (Steven Moffat).

88. “Nothing can ever be a rule in drama, because then you’re saying certain things won’t ever happen, and that would be very boring.” ~ (Steven Moffat).

Steven Moffat Quotes for Motivation

89. “Don’t be Lasagne – The Doctor.” ~ (Steven Moffat).

90. “The difference between a beautifully made failure and a beautifully made hit is who you’ve got playing the leads.” ~ (Steven Moffat).

91. “There are two events in everybody’s life that nobody remembers. Two moments experienced by every living thing. Yet no one remembers anything about them. Nobody remembers being born and nobody remembers dying. Is that why we always stare into the eye sockets of a skull? Because we’re asking, “What was it like?” “Does it hurt?” “Are you still scared?”.” ~ (Steven Moffat).

92. “Amy: I had something I wanted to tell him. Stuff always gets in the way. Canton: Stuff does that.” ~ (Steven Moffat).

93. “Fear is only a disadvantage if you want to attack-it’s brilliant if all you want to do is run away.” ~ (Steven Moffat).

94. “Stories are where memories go when they are forgotten.” ~ (Steven Moffat).

95. “We’re all stories, in the end.” ~ (Steven Moffat).

96. “I’ll be a story in your head. But that’s OK. We’re all stories, in the end. Just make it a good one, eh? Because it was, you know; it was the best.” ~ (Steven Moffat).

97. “Sometimes he missed the monochrome world of his first two incarnations. It had felt like a simpler, cleaner time; so many centuries had passed before he realized he’d just been color blind.” ~ (Steven Moffat).

98. “Cinema is so slow and boring compared to television.” ~ (Steven Moffat).

99. “Even the slash fiction, that’s a great way to learn to work. No one really does three-act structure, but just trying to put words that make somebody else turned on, that’s going to teach you more about writing than any writing college you can go to.” ~ (Steven Moffat).

100. “The Doctor: Don’t blink. Don’t even blink. Blink and you’re dead. They are fast. Faster than you can believe. Don’t turn your back. Don’t look away. And most of all, don’t blink. Good Luck.” ~ (Steven Moffat).

101. “I hope I won’t become hated by geeks everywhere, but I don’t really know comic books all that well.” ~ (Steven Moffat).

So these are some of the best Steven Moffat quotes.

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