Del Boy is a fictional character from the BBC sitcom ‘Only Fools and Horses’.


Funniest Del Boy Quotes

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Oh, leave it out Rodney, you couldn’t flog a black cat to a witch! ~ Del Boy.

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You know it makes sense. ~ Del Boy.

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They’re yuppies. They don’t speak proper English like what we do. ~ Del Boy.

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This time next year we’ll be millionaires! ~ Del Boy.

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Lovely jubbly! ~ Del Boy.

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I got a Persian rug with more food on it than a menu. ~ Del Boy.

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Not only have you managed to sink every battleship and aircraft carrier that you’ve ever sailed on, but now you’ve gone and knackered a gravy boat. ~ Del Boy.

Hilarious Del Boy Quotes

He who dares wins. He who hesitates… doesn’t. ~ Del Boy.

Rodney, everything between you and I is split straight down the middle: 60-40. ~ Del Boy.

She used to say, ‘It’s better to know you’ve lost than not to know you’ve won.’ Dear old Mum, she used to say some bloody stupid things. ~ Del Boy.

Not only have you managed to sink every battleship and aircraft carrier that you’ve ever sailed on, but now you’ve gone and knackered a gravy boat. ~ Del Boy.

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He who dares wins. ~ Del Boy.

As Macbeth said to Hamlet in A Midsummer Night’s Dream, ‘We’ve been done up like a couple of kippers.’ ~ Del Boy.

No chance of this happening with Rodney, is there? World War Three! This plonker can’t even get Channel Three! ~ Del Boy.

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I got a Persian rug with more food on it than a menu. ~ Del Boy.

Top Del Boy Quotes

One of my most favouritist meals is Duck à l’Orange, but I don’t know how to say that in French. ~ Del Boy.

Of course he couldn’t swim, he only had one bloody arm. He would have gone around in circles, wouldn’t he? ~ Del Boy.

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I’m a black belt in origami. ~ Del Boy.

It’s the toughest chicken I’ve ever known. It’s asked me for a fight in the car park twice. ~ Del Boy.

There’s no point in running away. Running away only wears out your shoes. ~ Del Boy.

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You plonker, Rodney! ~ Del Boy.

Best Del Boy Quotes

You’ve always been the same, even at school. Nothing but books, learning, education. That’s why you’re no good at snooker. ~ Del Boy.

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I used to be a midfield dynamo, played like Paul Gascoigne. Boycie used to play like Bamber Gascoigne. ~ Del Boy.

I see it as a combination of my business acumen and salesmanship, and your ability to drive a three-wheeled van. Badly. ~ Del Boy.

Asking a Trotter if he knows anything about chandeliers is like asking Mr Kipling if he knows anything about cakes. ~ Del Boy.

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If you had been in charge of The Last Supper it would have been a takeaway. ~ Del Boy.

You can’t trust the Old Bill, can ya? Look at that time they planted six gas cookers in my bedroom. ~ Del Boy.


French Del Boy Quotes

  • Bain-marie!
  • Chateauneuf du Pape!
  • Creme de la Menthe!
  • Au contraire!
  • Pot Pourri!
  • Bonnet de douche!

Watch ‘Del Boy’ in action in this video.


So these were the 33 top Del Boy quotes that are funny and hilarious.

Also read: Hilarious Dale Gribble Quotes for Fans of & King Of The Hill’ and Terrifying Freddy Krueger Quotes [A Nightmare On Elm Street].