Nick Miller is the protagonist of the FOX comedy series ‘New Girl’ and the role is played by Jake Johnson.

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Best Nick Miller Quotes

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The sky’s too fickle. It’s a play-place for butterflies. ~ Nick Miller.

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I need to eat my way out of a sandwich house. ~ Nick Miller.

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I am the stupidest of all the stupid boys. ~ Nick Miller.

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Nothing is ever truly broken. ~ Nick Miller.

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You can’t just say ‘butt drinking’ and then not explain what that is. That is two of my four favorite things. ~ Nick Miller.

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I don’t want a refund on my cruise and I don’t want a refund on you! ~ Nick Miller.

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Life sucks. Then it gets better. Then it sucks again. ~ Nick Miller.

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Leprechauns are real. ~ Nick Miller.

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I put on my special underwear because Jess is back because I made a promise I’d be wearing these when you came back. ~ Nick Miller.

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You gave me a cookie, I gave you a cookie. ~ Nick Miller.

You’re a real sandwich lady, and I wanna scream your name across the ocean. ~ Nick Miller.

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I like chipmunks more than squirrels. ~ Nick Miller.

I’m not gonna get sick. No germ can live in a body that is 65% beer. ~ Nick Miller.

I’m a very good secretary. ~ Nick Miller.

Funny Nick Miller Quotes

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I should have known those beets weren’t from nature. Nothing purple comes from nature. ~ Nick Miller.

Everything you just said makes me want to give you a wedgie in front of the others. ~ Nick Miller.

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I will push if I want to push. ~ Nick Miller.

It’s a weird life, but it’s where I’m at right now. ~ Nick Miller.

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I like getting older. I feel like I’m finally aging into my personality. ~ Nick Miller.

No, I don’t dance. I’m from the town of Footloose. ~ Nick Miller.

I hate doors! ~ Nick Miller.

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Sometimes, up close, art is ugly. ~ Nick Miller.

On a plus side, I’m being very witty during this fight. ~ Nick Miller.

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Absolutely not. No! I don’t trust fish. They breathe water. That’s crazy. ~ Nick Miller.

The eyeball fell off, that’s how you know it’s good! ~ Nick Miller.

I could pretend to be more like you, Jess, and live on a sparkly rainbow and drive a unicorn around and just sing all the time ~ Nick Miller.

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Fantasy and nightmare colliding. ~ Nick Miller.

No part of this conversation is making me wanna boil over with rage. ~ Nick Miller.

I’ve never been an inspiration before. I don’t like this much responsibility. ~ Nick Miller.

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It smells like leather, and Teddy Roosevelt, and wistfulness. ~ Nick Miller.

If we needed to talk about feelings, they would be called ‘talkings.’ ~ Nick Miller.

Witty Nick Miller Quotes

I’m not putting on the kimono. It legitimizes you owning it. ~ Nick Miller.

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I bought 10,000 minutes in 1999 and I’m still using them. ~ Nick Miller.

Do I regret it? Yes. Would I do it again? Probably. ~ Nick Miller.

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You’re a whiskey girl, like me. ~ Nick Miller.

Pink robes are my catnip. ~ Nick Miller.

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I refuse to pay for the weefee. ~ Nick Miller.

I once saw a zebra named Gavin give birth at the zoo, and I cried hysterically. ~ Nick Miller.

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Not true. Everything has meaning. Everything is connected to something else. ~ Nick Miller.

I’ve got two perfectly good forks at the end of my arms. ~ Nick Miller.

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My arms are so sore from doing so many push-ups. ~ Nick Miller.

You’re a terrible person. It’s hilarious. ~ Nick Miller.

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Twenty pages. And they’re all good! Some of them are good. Five pages are good. I really like the title. ~ Nick Miller.

Humorous Nick Miller Quotes

I can’t believe I’m the sober one. That’s actually never happened before in my life. ~ Nick Miller.

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I knew that French was gonna haunt me. ~ Nick Miller.

I’m gonna grab some old underpants and put a pair into the freezer for each of you. ~ Nick Miller.

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I’d give you a hug, but my shirt smells pretty weird today. ~ Nick Miller.

I fell in love with Jess the minute she walked through the door. ~ Nick Miller.

You’re a big girl, you can watch Walking Dead alone. ~ Nick Miller.

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When you put it like that, it sounds amazing and like prison. ~ Nick Miller.

I mean, I’m not doing squats or anything. I’m trying to eat less doughnuts. ~ Nick Miller.

Writers don’t read. We write. ~ Nick Miller.

Everybody has been flashed countless times, right? ~ Nick Miller.

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I don’t know what ‘mazel tov’ means, but it doesn’t sound good. ~ Nick Miller.

She is sleeping. By herself. Which is called napping. ~ Nick Miller.

I’m not convinced I know how to read, I’ve just memorized a lot of words. ~ Nick Miller.

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Men of means. ~ Nick Miller.

Top Nick Miller Quotes

It’s like a plant. It needs sun and air. ~ Nick Miller.

Sucks for me! ~ Nick Miller.

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I am not a successful adult. I don’t eat vegetables and or take care of myself. ~ Nick Miller.

Guys, please let me hate myself and everything that I have created. ~ Nick Miller.

Well get ready for the skin circus you little peanut. ~ Nick Miller.

I want to go in my room and do weird stuff on my computer. ~ Nick Miller.

What does a man do about that pain? ~ Nick Miller.

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I’m very focused. I thought I saw something shiny. ~ Nick Miller.

Of course we make decisions. How do you think I’m wearing clothes right now? ~ Nick Miller.

Looks like a puppet, like something an Italian whittled. ~ Nick Miller.

Funniest Nick Miller Quotes

I am not watching a kid get circumcised. ~ Nick Miller.

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Drinking to forget? That’s my sweet spot! ~ Nick Miller.

I want magic – is that so bad? ~ Nick Miller.

I’ve done things. I wrote half a book about zombies! ~ Nick Miller.

You can go to my funeral but you can’t talk. My funeral is my time to shine. ~ Nick Miller.

Why lie? You know how many Millers have been or currently are in jail? ~ Nick Miller.

When I work out, which isn’t often, I listen to Huey Lewis because it pumps me up. ~ Nick Miller.

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I stole that from Nelson Mandela. I added the part about the Penguin and the Riddler. ~ Nick Miller.

Stop being so mean to me or I swear to God I’m gonna fall in love with you. ~ Nick Miller.

That’s the only thing in the world I know to be true. ~ Nick Miller.

Famous Nick Miller Quotes

If you died, I’d be lost! ~ Nick Miller.

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You’re a freaking gold digger, Jess! ~ Nick Miller.

It’s not gonna end well for these two. ~ Nick Miller.

I have decided to give up on women and put all of that energy into tomatoes. ~ Nick Miller.

You got hurt by a hog man! ~ Nick Miller.

I don’t deal with exes. They’re part of the past. You burn them swiftly and give their ashes to Poseidon. ~ Nick Miller.

Just be yourself, and if he’s not into Jessica Day, there’s something wrong with him. ~ Nick Miller.

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I feel like you’re not meaning to say what you’re saying. ~ Nick Miller.

If I can’t have a kid with a woman, then maybe I’ll have one with my cousin. ~ Nick Miller.

I once tried on my girl cousin’s wool tights and I didn’t hate how it felt. ~ Nick Miller.

I know this isn’t gonna end well, but the middle part is gonna be awesome. ~ Nick Miller.

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We can’t break up if I don’t hear you. No! La, la, la, la. ~ Nick Miller.

First order of business – we eat their food. ~ Nick Miller.

I like your hat. I like how it’s not a team or a logo – it’s just blue. ~ Nick Miller.

Inspiring Nick Miller Quotes

Turning lemonade into lemons since 1981. ~ Nick Miller.

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You’re allowed to be happy, but it’s really annoying the way you’re doing it. ~ Nick Miller.

Is calling a girl ‘Shorty’ still cool? ~ Nick Miller.

I look very handsome. I look like I’m on Miami Vice. ~ Nick Miller.

Sponges make me feel exhilarated. ~ Nick Miller.

I found an ant farm filled with candy wrappers, is this essential? ~ Nick Miller.

That’s more like dork magic. ~ Nick Miller.

She’s not quirky. She has no bangs. ~ Nick Miller.

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Hey! If I cooked up a whole chicken, would you guys have some? ~ Nick Miller.

DeeDee? That’s not a name. ~ Nick Miller.

I’m just telling her what kind of cake to bake me, son. ~ Nick Miller.

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I’m perfectly fine to watch TV all day. ~ Nick Miller.

I don’t know if Hogwarts is near San Diego. I’ve never heard of it. ~ Nick Miller.

You treat an outside wound with rubbing alcohol. You treat an inside wound by drinking alcohol. ~ Nick Miller.

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No, we’re adult men. We’re cute. ~ Nick Miller.

Adele’s amazing. ~ Nick Miller.

I don’t believe dinosaurs existed. I’ve seen the science. I don’t believe it. ~ Nick Miller.

It’s not a perfect system Jess, but it’s mine okay? And it’s private. ~ Nick Miller.

Make up an excuse and get out of jury duty. Jess, please, I need you. ~ Nick Miller.

Trust me, I’m wearing frozen underpants right now and I feel amazing. ~ Nick Miller.

Just drive the car. I gotta tell my girlfriend that I don’t love her so she doesn’t leave me. ~ Nick Miller.

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I moved to Los Angeles to get closer to whales so I could record them. ~ Nick Miller.

A bank is just a paper bag but with fancier walls. ~ Nick Miller.

I believe horses are from outer space. ~ Nick Miller.

So these were the 125 top Nick Miller quotes that are funny, hilarious and witty.

Also read: Andy Bernard Quotes from TV Show & The Office’ and Ragnar Lothbrok Quotes from TV Show & Vikings’.

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